Saturday, June 27, 2015


“Careful what you wish for,” they say. The same can be said for prayer – careful what you pray for.

I regularly pray that God use me as His vessel. His representative. That when people see me, they see Him.

And what I’ve learned is that He doesn’t want me to impress others with a flawless life. He doesn’t want me to portray a polished lifestyle, a perfect family, or always being ‘put-together.’ Instead, He has me regularly expose my hidden imperfections. To allow others to do the same. And in that has been an ocean of grace.

Why, you might ask? Because God says we’re enough. Just as we are.

“For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10 (NIV)

Wednesday, June 24, 2015


Tuesday, June 23, 2015


Thumbing through phone pics I've taken the past week, I stopped on this one and stared a while. How can this be? How can he be gearing up for his driving permit?! He was just born, for crying out loud! I cannot handle how he looks. There's this tiny, psychotic part of my brain that's saying first: driving, second: graduating, third: marrying. It's so jarring. This handsome grownup-ness is undeniable, and his face resembles a man face more and more every year. We're reaching the end years of childhood. (This is a horrible realization to have when PMSing.)

Friday, June 19, 2015


Reality check this morning. Studying the concept of “favor” and am finding how drastically different the favor of man is from the favor of God. And how fatefully misdirected I usually am in my pursuit. 

Thursday, June 18, 2015


I recently saw the movie Wild. Yes, I’ve been living under a tree, apparently. There's nothing too glamorous about a three month journey up the Pacific Crest Trail, but it certainly allowed Strayed to rediscover herself and move forward after her mother's death – that’s the physical and emotional brutality of it is. But there's something alluring about her experience, enough to inspire many others to set out on the PCT in search of the same kind of enlightenment. Sometimes we just need to be broken. We know that solitude and challenges pull something out of us, and that somehow we feel better after having gone through it. We learn something we didn't know before or end of proving to ourselves, and maybe others, that we're strong and fearless.

I want to push myself this year, try new things, take a class or two, get out of my comfort zone--yes. That's important for growth for all of us. But I don't want to fall into the trap of believing that some big experience unearths the story of my life any more than standing still and paying attention to all the small stories that exist and are waiting to be discovered right here, right now. And I don't need to wait for some hard thing or trek in solitude to be suddenly side-swept with inspiration. 

I return to one of my favorite quotes:

"No one longs for what he or she already has, and yet the accumulated insight of those wise about the spiritual life suggests that the reason so many of us cannot see the red X that marks the spot is because we are standing on it. The treasure we seek requires no lengthy expedition, no expensive equipment, no superior aptitude or special company. All we lack is the willingness to imagine that we already have everything we need. The only thing missing is our consent to be where we are." 

~Barbara Brown Taylor, An Altar in the World

There's so much richness right here for all of us, no matter how mundane our routines are or how much of our week we spend in traffic lines. Our story is not controlled by what happens to us but rather how we write it.

Tuesday, June 2, 2015


If you’re a busy mom, you may it hard to set aside time for prayer each day. I know I do. Early mornings, sometimes, in my car ride to work, is when I strive to spend a few moments with The Lord. But don’t feel like prayer has to take place only when you’re able to draw away into the peace and quiet. Integrate prayer into your work schedule, into the children’s’ activities.

It’s important, too, that we use prayer as a steering wheel, not a spare tire. It will unlock amazing blessings.

Dear Lord,
Thank you for trusting me with the tasks and duties of being a mother. Thank you for blessings that are my husband, daughter(s), and son(s). Thank you for establishing a bond of love between us that cannot be broken. One that is sustaining whole and holy. I pray that you will always bless their minds to be clear of shadows of doubt. Bless their hearts to be kind. Bless their dreams that they may be fulfilled by your grace.

Thank you for your sustenance through difficult times we have faced and are facing. Thank you for writing your will upon our hearts. Give us all courage and strength to live out your will.
I pray that you love my family when they hurt. Love them when they feel fear. Love them when they are not strong enough to love themselves.
In Jesus’ name. Amen

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