Monday, March 9, 2015


I got home late from work the other night and my husband immediately pointed to a glass of wine waiting for me on the kitchen counter. As I sat on a barstool nearby the stove, I observed as my husband went in and out of the house to check the grilling steaks, offer up snacks to our whining baby, run back outside again to check the steaks, unload the dishes, and give an occasional stir to whatever was coking in the sauce pan.

Though I am no stranger to this juggling act, it’s sure nice that I don’t have to endure it alone. My husband always stands ready to offer his help, even for what many consider the womanly duties of the home. Which got me thinking about what I see missing in so many marriages today – the simple act of thankfulness.

Choosing to be thankful for my husband is why we excel at marriage. Many years ago, I read an article about being thankful for smelly laundry and dirty dishes because it meant that your children were fed and clothed. That simple shift in focus had a profound effect on how I viewed my family and my responsibilities of taking care of them. Changing from a ‘have to’ attitude to a ‘get to’ attitude made and continues to make a huge difference in my own attitude towards parenting.

This habit of thankfulness has since spilled over into my marriage.  Instead of focusing on what was annoying about my husband, I began choosing to be thankful for the things that were a blessing about him. His messy garage is now a reminder of all the woodworking he’s done which provided for our family. His piles of mail and receipts are now a reminder that he’s making a good living so that we can buy the things we need to live. His annoying dancing and dipping is now a reminder of how much he still loves me.  I am constantly filled with gratitude towards my husband and I try hard to let him know it!   Our husbands need our appreciation to give them the energy to keep working and serving their families.

I have seen many torn apart by divorce recently.  I’m sharing this today in hopes that this small change in attitude could be the catalyst for healing in another couples’ marriage.
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