Monday, July 15, 2013

PARENTING STYLES



There is a thin line between parenting styles. One that can often be a deal-breaker for some friendships.

I seem to be having this conversation more often than not – with friends just entering the world of parenting. I suppose fellow mommies feel I’m all knowing in the world of raising children, since my seniority reigns at roughly 13 years. But I am hardly worthy of advice. I just know what has worked for me and my family.

Pete and I believe that our mission as parents is to raise our children filled to the brim with love, as both the giver and the receiver. But children are born sinners…it is innate to us all. So, as soon as we feel a child can decipher right from wrong, we whole-heartedly help to form and shape them to model respect and kindness. Our parenting isn’t filled with doom and gloom and constant correction, but the potential for discipline hangs lowly above at all times. 

There is comfort in knowing your boundaries, and I think children thrive in an environment where expectations are clearly understood. Alongside that, we compliment our children with positive praise and encouragement, enabling them and empowering them with confidence and indenpence. And oh, how we fail at times – anger and frustration get the best of us. So, we pray and read and seek resolve from others, but most importantly we surround ourselves with people who propel us in a Godly way of parenting.

I’ve once or twice been told that we’re too hard on our children, and I do, in fact, wonder at times if maybe. But then I’m told by teachers and parents how ideal my children behave, and that squashes any doubt I may have had. Our kids might be manipulative and bratty at home - there are days when their mantra is defiance, but their light shines when it counts.





6 comments:

  1. Thanks for this post.

    I, myself have moved towards a more gentler approach. No punishments no rewards. Actually, I find it very easy to reason with my kids.

    One thing that helps me, is to remind myself that kids are human. They are not robots. As adults, when someone tells us something, do we do it the first time? What about the 10th? Sometimes we never get it. Why should it be different for kids? Why should we expect they will do things after the first time or the tenth time we have told them?

    Our Heavenly Father asks us to do many things we don't do. It's not because it's not right, it's because we are his children and are hard headed.

    I have a very good friend, and we had a civil discussion - and come from two opposite viewpoints. She mentioned that she spanks her children to get them to behave and I am 100% the anti-spanker. I told her that I don't understand why it's against the law to hit others, but it's condoned that we hit our kids.

    It's hard for me to even comprehend.

    We both stated our viewpoints, we listened to each other not judging - and then we moved on.

    We are still very good friends - and respect and love our differences.

    I just wanted to let you know that we have a new Mommy Monday Blog hop. I would absolutely love to see you there.

    http://squishablebaby.com/mommy-monday-blog-hop-week-3/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have some strong points, Lisa, thanks for sharing. I'm glad that you've been able to resolve parenting conflicts between you and your peers - not all of us are as fortunate to reason and/or compromise.

      Thank you, too, for the invitation to the Mommy Monday Blog Hop -- I have a note on my calendar to visit there next week.

      Delete
  2. I have firm ground rules in my house too. My oldest tells me that I'm strict, but I have high expectations that I expect my kids to live up to. They are very well behaved in public so I know that I'm doing something right :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No doubt, you're doing something right, Ann - expectations and boundaries are good to set, in my personal opinion. And when kids know they've reached those milestones, and we look upon them with pride, it equally fills them up with pride. I read somewhere once that children connect love with discipline -- it's a reminder that their parents care about them and their outcome.

      Delete
  3. "...but most importantly we surround ourselves with people who propel us in a Godly way of parenting." <--- LOVE THAT! Very beautifully written. Thanks for sharing this!

    XOXO/Lena @ RootandBlossom

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Lena - you're too sweet! It's true that when we surround ourselves with people that are similarly yoked, their love and support help keep you focused.

      Delete

I am incredibly grateful for your comment! I will respond as soon as possible. XOXO, Mandi

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...