Tuesday, May 2, 2017

THE LIFE AFTER


Many of you ask frequently ask how I’m feeling, and while I’m quick to rebuttal, “Great! I’m really good,” I feel compelled to elaborate. Honestly, I have felt pulled between being honest about my symptoms and focusing on a much bigger and more pressing goal – living life to the fullest. I’m still trying to work out the kinks and pave a new path for what lies ahead, all the while keeping my eyes on the prize. 

It’s been a recurrent struggle, a back and forth tug of war between then and now. Cancer isn’t just a moment in time. It’s not just something that happens and eventually goes away. It doesn’t sit on a timeline nor does it have a beginning or an end. From the moment it physically rooted itself into my anatomy, it also marked my very DNA and soul. Though we believe I am free of disease, I am forever marked by it and affected by it. Though I walk without cancer, I will forever carry its side effects with me.

I will also add that after cancer, life is more confusing than anyone told me it would be. Frankly, they don’t tell you what to anticipate when the disease is gone and the dust settles. I always thought that time healed all wounds. That maybe, just maybe, this period in time would fade away into the history of my life’s story. And though I still believe there is some truth in that, I think that healing requires more than days gone by. Life after cancer requires head work and soul work. Partly determined to avoid feeling victimized by cancer, and partly because I believe that living a life that is joyful and grateful and adventurous is really living life instead of letting life live you.

Adventuring removes barriers, manifests breakthrough, unites, births joy, and uplifts the dark corners of our souls. It ignites in us a passion for this life that we often forget is meant to be experienced actively, not sedentarily. It pushes us off the cliff of comfort and gives us wings to fly in vibrant ways. It freshens stagnancy, quenches deserts, and elevates us to living the way we are called to live. Adventure gives us new perspective and creates vision. Though comfort is easy and adventure is often hard, the rewards for the latter are much greater.

Cancer stole so much from me, but through it, God gifted me eternal vision and has radically changed my perspective on the purpose of this life. 



Ecclesiastes 3:12-13 (ESV)
“I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil—this is God’s gift to man.”



Monday, April 24, 2017

CRYING OUT


So many times I find myself in a situation where I have no idea which path to take. I’d like to say I’m one of those people who hears God’s audible voice giving me specific answers, but that’s not always the case. I often pray for weeks, sometimes toiling over a decision instead of trusting Him to guide me.

In those desperate times when we scan the horizon, and the path in every direction looks bleak, only one thing will get us out of our mess – crying out to God. His ways are more complex that our own, and He will answer in the most unexpected ways.



Saturday, April 22, 2017

BE VERY GLAD



“Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven.”
Matthew 5:12



Thursday, April 20, 2017

NOISE


I often pray and then fill my life with so much noise that I can’t hear God speak. My busy schedule doesn’t make it any easier. That’s why step one is so critical. God often speaks in whispers. We must be silent to listen. And we can’t hear God if we don’t make time to get alone with Him daily. 



Tuesday, April 18, 2017

LIFE IN PICTURES




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